11.30.2011

rat tails, mullets, and dreads, oh my!

pretty sure i've spoken with some of my "readership" personally about this issue, but in case i haven't (and really even if i have) i'm pretty sure this is a NZ phenomena worthy of a blog post.  this post is about dreadful hairstyles - namely the rat tail..



ok ok, so that's not a real photo of someone i've met here. but it made me laugh and kind of gets the point across straight away don't you think? c'mon, you didn't laugh? anyway, if you've ever been through customs to get into NZ, you'll know they are pretty strict. no food, no medicines, no articles of clothing that may have dirt on them, and any animals that come into the country need to be quarantined for a significant amount of time.  it's great because it means that a lot of pests and diseases that are found in other countries aren't found here, however, it seems that one must have snuck by somewhere along the line because never in my life have i seen more rat tails per capita anywhere in the world.

before i left for NZ, many of my girlfriends got overly excited with the notion that i would immediately fall into the arms of some dashingly handsome man with an accent, get married, and ride off into the sunset with our dual citizenship.  it's a question i get a lot from most people - "so are you dating any one? are you in love with a kiwi yet?" - and it's been a little embarrassing disappointing people with answers like "eh, not really."

so, i'm blaming the rat tails.  first of all, it's a completely ridiculous hairstyle for someone to come up with.  how does one even start? do you one day wake up and go to the barber for your regular trim but say "oh wait, not right here in this little area. i'm going for a rat tail?" and i'm pretty sure it's well know that this is not an attractive hairstyle. it doesn't earn street cred among other men, and it certainly doesn't up your game with the ladies - so what's the point?  i could probably go on for an hour. get a couple beers in me and i can go on for a couple of hours.

anyway, unlike the first photo, these are all unfortunately real photos of real people i have encountered - just to prove i'm not just single because i'm completely dude repellent. i said "completely"...


given my lack of stealth, this is actually a photo of a guy showing off his rat tail to me. yep, bragging. i even got the story of how it all began, just a mere dream of a boy with a mullet....

um, ginger dreads? sorry dude, don't think the guitar is that strong of an airbrush for that...

sooieeeeeeeee pig pig pig

i doubt you can tell, but that black blob on the right hand side of the photo is a set of floor length dreads that belong to a guy who goes to my gym...and runs miles on the treadmill. now that's talent, people.

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